Longing

The dictionary states that the word Longing means - strong, persistent desire or craving, especially for something that is unattainable or distant.

My particular longing is for something that feels so very distant. I am longing to hold this sweet little baby of ours. To snuggle him, kiss him, smell him, watch his every movement and facial expression in complete awe.

This pregnancy has definitely felt like the longest pregnancy...ever. The first half of the pregnancy seemed to fly by. What with being a mom of two busy children, working part time, trying to keep house, and trying to 'maintain' my good wife status...why wouldn't it!? Then the second half of the pregnancy came about, and we took a little unexpected 'detour' if you will. Going from completely busy full days of being in full on Mom/Wife mode, to bed rest came as a bit of a shock to my system...it has definitely taken some getting use to! (and I can NOT wait to be able to go back to full on Mom/Wife mode!! "Resume" my life...cook meals for my family, clean my house, take my kids places...even if it's just for a walk to the park, see my friends, craft/sew/scrapbook...be a family under one roof for more than just the weekend!! etc...)

Time has most definitely seemed to pass by faster since I have been able to be in High River with my kids! At times I feel like we still have so long to go, while on the other hand we're down to the final count down (3 WEEKS!!)

I guess when you are told half way through your pregnancy that you are at risk of going into pre-term labor again, and there is a chance of loosing your baby (if we didn't pass the point of viability)...you wonder every day if this day will be the day that it happens, or if you will make it to the next....making every day feel like a week, and every week feel like a month!

I'm not sure who is getting to be more impatient, me or the kids. Marshall asks me almost every day if the baby is coming out of my tummy. In fact just last week Irish and I celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary. We went into Calgary for dinner, while my most amazing in-laws looked after the kids.

The following morning the kids come down into our room. Marshall comes to my side of the bed, walking very cautiously and asks "Mom, did the doctor take the baby out, or is it still in your tummy?" I told him that the baby was still in my tummy...to which I have never seen a more disappointed face. I reminded him that we had to have his birthday first, and then the baby will come. He then asks "Is my birthday tomorrow?!" I had a little chuckle as his birthday was still 9 days away.

He then climbs into bed with us...yes all 4 (I guess you could say 5...with the size of my belly) of us, 'cozied' up in a double bed, comfortable wouldn't you say!?

A couple minutes later he hops out of the bed and peeks over the side of the crib that is in the room (I had some clothes hanging over the side, thus preventing his ability to see through the side). I only assume he was checking to see if a baby was by chance laying in there, as once he discovered that there wasn't one, his shoulders and head dropped and he slowly crawled back into the bed pouting!

Every morning when I come upstairs and the kids see me Paisley's first reaction is "BABY!" as she runs to me with out stretched arms and gives my belly a soft hug and a kiss, and then says "Hi Mom" and returns to what she was doing prior!

Every time the kids leave the house, or go to bed they always have to say goodbye/night to baby! It's so cute, I LOVE IT! I can't wait to see them with their new little brother!

Needless to say, this baby is being very patiently (somewhat) awaited by very excited siblings who are just waiting to love on him! (and I might add Parents too!)

Here's to counting down the days :)